The Ball and The Box

I found this pictorial description of the journey of grief on Twitter last night. It is an unusual but very accurate illustration of anguish after the death of a loved one. Initially I planned on sharing this just with my present group of GriefShare participants, but then I thought it might help CandyceLand readers to understand why intense sorrow hurts so much and lasts so long for their family members, friends, co-workers, and neighbors after the loss of someone very dear to them. Most importantly, though, if any of you have ever experienced a traumatic grief yourself, this might explain why years later the intense pain can unexpectedly resurface.

(Credit goes to Lauren Herschel who posted this analogy given to her by her doctor.)

So grief is like this:

There’s a box with a ball in it. And a pain button.

In the beginning, the ball is huge. You can’t move the box without the ball hitting the pain button. It rattles around on its own in there and hits the button over and over. You can’t control it - it just keeps hurting. Sometimes it seems unrelenting.

Over time, the ball gets smaller. It hits the button less and less but when it does, it hurts just as much. It’s better because you can function day to day more easily. But the downside is that the ball randomly hits that button when you least expect it.

For most people, the ball never really goes away. It might hit less and less and you have more time between hits, unlike when the ball was still giant. I thought this was the best description grief I've heard in a long time.

The Work of Christmas

This past Friday night Steve and I had the pleasure of traveling to Wilton, CT to hear Steve's sister Annbeth and niece Megan sing in The Wilton Singers, a community choral society. One of the songs, entitled The Work Of Christmas, was very moving and has been permanently planted in my mind because of both the tune and the lyrics. 

Click here to listen to the song:

When the song of the angels is stilled,

When the star in the sky is gone,

When the kings and princes are home,

When the shepherds are back with their flock,

The work of Christmas begins:

To find the lost,

To heal the broken,

To feed the hungry,

To release the prisoner,

To rebuild the nations,

To bring peace among brothers,

To make music from the heart.

Perhaps this struck a chord within me because for years now I've considered Christmas to be a "Sufferer's Holiday," an idea I borrowed from the GriefShare series, Surviving the Holidays. The birth of Christ inaugurated the beginning of the end of suffering for the world. Genesis 3 unleashed sin and misery and death and pain on mankind, and the newborn baby Jesus in Bethlehem began to remedy the problem that man created in the Garden. Our Messiah would live a perfect, sinless life, die on the cross, and be resurrected so that Heaven would be open to our arrival.

But what to do between now and this future time? There is good work to be done in the form of finding, healing, feeding, releasing, rebuilding, bringing, and singing together. While all of this comes from God, He has decided to work through people like us as He makes His kingdom visible to a watching world. What a privilege it is for reclaimed sinners to be part of the work of Christmas!

Part 1 of Paul Tripp on James 1:2-4

Paul Tripp's thoughts: "The comfort in James 1:2-4 confronts us with what we truly want out of life. There are only two types of motivating hopes. You either hook your hope to a physical, situational life of comfort, success, strength, and pleasure or to a life of rich spiritual awakening, growth, and Godward glory. The Bible presents the second option as not only infinitely more satisfying in the long run but also that for which we were made. Because we were made for it, it does a much better job of satisfying the longing that's in all our hearts. Suffering in the hands of God is a powerful tool of personal growth and transformation. Here's what God does in us through the tool of hardship:

Count it all joy, my brothers, 

when you meet trials of various kinds, 

for you know that the testing of your faith 

produces steadfastness. 

And let steadfastness have its full effect, 

that you may be perfect and complete, 

lacking in nothing.

"That is a remarkable passage because it calls and alerts us to something counterintuitive. We don't typically experience joy in suffering; in fact, many of us lose our joy even in the face of the smallest obstacles. Now, don't misunderstand what James is calling you to here. He's not saying you should rejoice because of pain and loss. This is not a call to joyful Christian stoicism. Rather, James is saying that you have reason to rejoice in the middle of your travail because of how God is using your suffering to produce in you what you could never produce in yourself. Suffering in the hands of God is used to fill you up, to grow you up, and to complete God's work in you."

Candy's thoughts: If you've been a CandyceLand reader for any length of time you will know by now that my two favorite modern-day theologians are Nancy Guthrie and Paul David Tripp. Most of you also know that our EPC Women's Bible Study classes this year (maybe 2 or 3 years? 😉) are examining in great detail the book of James. This past weekend, then, there was a melding together of Tripp and James when I resumed reading Tripp's book on suffering. This is an excellent read, one in which Tripp explores the world of pain through the lens of his own terrible physical affliction.

Steve and I were reflecting recently on the personal events of this past year, and we have dubbed 2019 as the year of "sickness and septics."  Local folks know that I have struggled with respiratory issues ever since my hospitalization in March; at the same time our house was hit hard by septic issues that required 2 of the very same kind of renovations. While I am just now starting to feel better, and the 2nd home repairs are 90% completed, I can honestly confess that I did not consider either of these challenges as "joyful." I do, however, agree with Tripp that God's goal in our trials is to grow us, transform us, and ultimately complete His work in us. 

While I see no evidence yet that #sicknessandseptics have had a positive effect on me (my fault not God's), I hope that in time I will be able to look back and 'count it joy' that God cared enough to move me along toward the goal of 'producing in me what I could have never produced in myself.' 

Seeing Jesus

"Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls."  (1 Peter 1:8-9)

Piper's thoughts: We See Him Through the Word of God

How does it happen? How does this kind of seeing happen? It happens through the Word of God. When the gospel of Christ is preached, we can see Christ more clearly for who he really is than many could see in his own lifetime. If you read the gospels, Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John, with openness to Christ, you can see the true glory of Christ far more clearly than most of the people who knew him on earth could see him—Nicodemus, the Syrophoenician woman, the Centurion, the widow of Nain, Zacchaeus, the thief on the cross, the thronging crowds. They saw a snatch here and a snatch there. But in the gospels you get four complementary portraits of Christ inspired by God and covering the whole range of his teaching and his ministry.

The gospels are better than being there. You are taken into the inner circle of the apostolic band where you never could have gone. You go with him through Gethsemane and the trial and the crucifixion and the resurrection and the meetings after the resurrection. You hear whole sermons and long discourses—not in isolated snatches on hillsides but in rich God-inspired contexts that take you deeper than you ever could have gone as a perplexed peasant in Galilee. You see the whole range of his character and power which nobody on earth saw as fully as you can now see in the gospels: you see his freedom from anxiety with no place to lay his head, his courage in the face of opposition, his unanswerable wisdom, his honoring women, his tenderness with children, his compassion toward lepers, his meekness in suffering, his patience with Peter, his tears over Jerusalem, his blessing those who cursed him, his heart for the nations, his love for the glory of God, his simplicity and devotion, his power to still storms and heal the sick and multiply bread and cast out demons."

Candy's thoughts: What an amazing privilege for those of us who live on this side of the cross! As Piper points out, we can 'See Jesus' even better than those who walked beside him because his Word describes his life, his teachings, his love, and his devotion to his Father, not just glimpses by those who followed him occasionally. May we then take up and read the Scriptures with great thanksgiving for the great gift of the salvation of our souls.

Making The Invisible Kingdom Visible

 

Here is an article sent to me by our good friend Kurt. It is time well-spent to read and contemplate on its many possible applications. I have some thoughts at the end of the page as well. "On November 6, 2010, the Hallmark Channel aired a made-for-television movie entitled “A Family Thanksgiving” about an unmarried lawyer and a “genie [who] comes along and changes the whole situation.” Though I doubt anyone back then thought this would launch a television phenomenon, Hallmark’s annual “Countdown to Christmas” is, for many, an annual tradition. Now in its tenth season, the 232-and counting-movies may not be exact clones of a “A Family Thanksgiving,” but they’re pretty close. If you’ve seen one of these movies, you’ve seen them all. The sappiness of “Hallmark’s Countdown to Christmas” triggers a Pavlovian snark response for many of us. None of these movies are, shall we say, “critically acclaimed.” Still, what these movies lack in Oscar nominations, they make up for in something that those creating and distributing edgier flicks would kill for: millions and millions of viewers. A typical “Countdown to Christmas” movie premiere attracts between three and five percent of all viewers during its time slot. In other words, these are the most-viewed non-sports and news shows on cable television. In no way am I suggesting that “popular” is the same thing as “good” or even “worth your time,” but it’s clear that “Countdown to Christmas” has struck a nerve with an audience. Why? Part of the answer is probably sentimentality, but I think that “Countdown to Christmas” is also tapping into people’s sense of longing. Specifically, the longing for an alternative to modern society and culture. For example, I wonder if many viewers long for a world in which “boy meets girl” doesn’t have to include “boy and girl have sex.” In stark contrast to what hits the tube and silver screen these days, in Hallmark Channel movies said “boy” and said “girl” often don’t even appear tempted by the idea. I also wonder if people today are longing for the sort of world that is the setting for these movies, a place my colleague has dubbed “Hallmark Town.” In “Hallmark Town,” people are friendly, cheerful, and neighborly. Families are close and also prepared to welcome strangers into their homes and lives. In “Hallmark Town,” no broke, single mother facing Christmas in a cheap hotel with her kids needs to worry. Some group of people will always be there to make sure she has a job, a home, a tree, and presents for her kids by Christmas, even if it is (spoiler alert) just in the nick of time. Given the hyper-individualism, selfishness, loneliness, isolation, and family chaos that characterizes our modern culture, who wouldn’t want to live in “Hallmark Town”? Unfortunately, “Hallmark Town” just doesn’t exist. The Kingdom of God, however, does exist, having been inaugurated two millennia ago. The church, as Chuck Colson often said, is tasked with making this invisible kingdom visible. John Stott called the church “God’s New Society” and, when functioning well, it’s far better than “Hallmark Town.” We aren’t motivated by some vague “spirit of Christmas.” The kindness the church can display is a tangible reflection of what St. Paul called the “kindness of God our savior.” This kindness saved us from the sin, malice, envy, and hate that marked our lives. Not only did God’s kindness deliver us from our broken and misguided passions and from constantly pursuing but never actually gaining a pleasure that can satisfy our souls, it freed us to live for the One who loved us and gave Himself for us. When Christians do that, it blesses and serves others. In a world where people seek to escape and take refuge in made-for-television movies, the potential if the church would be the church is amazing. In fact, the gates of hell couldn’t stand against it." Candy's thoughts: Breakpoint is making a very good point. There is a longing, for Christians AND unbelievers, to view movies without the excessive profanity, violence, and immorality that is common in our present "Hollywood" culture. But an even better endeavor is for "The Church" to proclaim the Christian hope that we have in the Scriptures. That hope is not only about the future, it changes the way we live in the present. We can be a mirror into a world of genuine love and service to others if we are willing to follow the plan that Jesus has for the church even now.

A Prayer About Being Too Easily Annoyed

"Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult."  (Prov. 12:16)

Yesterday during our two Women's Bible Study classes I read the following prayer written by Scotty Smith and published in Everyday Prayers: 365 Days to a Gospel-Centered Faith. As our friend Ruth pointed out after we were done praying, this prayer made us both laugh and cringe. Smith really convicted me by his very first example: merging cars on a road.  😆😧

Anyway, enough people asked me to send it to them personally that I thought I would just post here for everyone to see. I would appreciate hearing your thoughts in the comments below or by email.


"Jesus, of all the prayer-worthy things I can think of, "annoyance" has never made it onto my supplication list until now. Through the pastoral pestering of your Spirit,  I see and grieve that I'm too easily annoyed. Have mercy on me, Prince of Peace. Free my foolish, fretful, fitful spirit. How can I possibly reveal the magnificence of the gospel when I'm showcasing the arrogance of my annoyance?

I'm annoyed by the guy who races me when two lanes are becoming one. I'm annoyed when the bar code reading machines in the self-checkout lanes can't read my items. I'm annoyed when the gas pump trickles way too slowly. I'm annoyed by waiters who fish for a bigger tip. I'm annoyed by fish that won't bite. I'm annoyed by humidity when I want to jog.

I'm annoyed by low talkers and loud talkers. I'm annoyed at people easily annoyed. I'm annoyed when I have to repeat myself, I'm annoyed at whiners, so much that I start whining. I'm annoyed when people use way too many words and way too big of words to say something way simple, as though that's not me too.

I'm annoyed at ever having to wait in line for anything. I'm annoyed by the color orange. I'm annoyed at any box that has the words "requires some assembly" written on it. Oh, Jesus, if only those were the only things that annoy me!

My prayer? Gentle my heart with your kindness and grace. Grant me much quicker repentances. Help me to slow...way...down. Help me to live in the moment and not simply live to get somewhere on time or get something done. Let me see people with your eyes and respond to them with your heart. There are no ordinary people around me. Everybody matters. Everybody has stories of heartache, foolishness, fear, and longing, just like me. Jesus, thank you that you died for all of my sins, including my "annoyability." I love being loved by you. I have no greater hope than knowing one day I will love like you love. I pray in your gracious and patient name. Amen."

'Alone' is a Redemptive Impossibility

"If you're God's child, don't ever tell yourself that you are alone - for you, 'alone' is a redemptive impossibility."  Paul David Tripp

Tripp's thoughts: "Walking away from the funeral of a loved one, you can feel very alone. Dealing with long-term sickness is a very lonely experience. Facing financial difficulties that you have no means to solve can make you feel very weak and alone. It's a lonely experience to deal with the personal rejection of a loved one. Standing for what is right in a culture that mocks the morals you hold dear can make you fearful and alone. Assessing that you don't have what it takes to face what you cannot escape can make you feel unprepared and alone. Loneliness of some kind is the universal experience of people living this side of eternity. Sin brought alienation and separation into the world. It first broke the fellowship between God and man, and because it did, it also shattered the fellowship between people and their family members, friends, and neighbors. This aloneness is spiritual, emotional, relational, and cultural. It's nearly impossible to escape.

The drama of human aloneness is captured by the apostle Paul in Eph. 2:11-12, but there is more. He also captures how the grace of Jesus Christ reconciles us to God and, in so doing, reconciles us to one another so that we will never again be alone.

Let these words sink in: from "having no hope and without God in the world" to "reconciled... to God" and "being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit." What is the movement of grace? We have gone from being hopeless and alone to being reconciled and inhabited by God, and therefore never alone again! Don't forget to remind yourself again today that as God's child you simply cannot be alone, no matter what you feel."

Candy's thoughts: Isn't it counter-intuitive to think that we can feel more alone in a crowded room of people than when we are actually by ourselves with no one else nearby? I have certainly felt that way in many situations in the past, and I have to admit that thinking of God 'being with me' is not the first thought that pops into my mind. Mostly I have wanted to escape the situation and flee to a more comfortable place. But understanding how we got to this "universal experience" of loneliness (think Genesis 3) to where we are going (think heaven) might aid us when feeling abandoned by the world that threatens to undo us. God has graciously provided the means by which we can move from isolation to eternal belonging. We are not alone.

Eternity on the Ropes

Many years ago I saw the video posted below and it has never left my memory. Later I would read Forever: Why You Can't Live Without It by Paul David Tripp and recognized the same basic theme. In a July 16th, 2018 blogpost (Read here) I wrote a summary of Tripp's book, in which he coins the term "eternity amnesia." This refers to the state of mind that each one of us experiences when we get caught up in the busyness of daily living and regrettably forget the biblical goal set before us: eternity. Here is a memorable illustration of this point by Francis Chan. I welcome your comments on this 4 minute video.

Click Here to See video

Piles of Evidence

Ed Welch's thoughts: "Our lives are full of uncertainties. We never know what the day will bring. Worries, fears, and stress are part of daily life. We shouldn't be surprised, then, that Scripture says so much about it, and that what it says is both attractive and helpful. The Lord responds to our fears with words of comfort, which he is pleased to repeat again and again.

His words to us cluster around two themes: your God is very near, and he gives the grace and power you need for today. The aim of this book is to help us become more skillful in how we identify our fears and anxieties, hear God's good words, and grow. You could say that our goal is wisdom. Wisdom is another name for skill in living.

If there is a rap against wisdom, it is that wisdom takes time. Anxieties, of course, prefer relief now. But what wisdom can do is set out a path that leaves you a little different with each step. Over time you notice the changes A little farther down the road and others notice. As you walk, you will learn much about the paradox of strength in weakness, and you will feel more fully human and alive. The rhythm of your journey is simple; God speaks and you listen. 

You put your fears into words - he will help you if you don't even know where to begin. He takes your fears and anxieties to heart without ever minimizing them. Then he speaks. You "treasure" what he says (Proverbs 2:1). You think about it, act on it, and talk about it. And the conversation continues. When you feel lost, you speak to the Lord. He listens to you. When you are stuck, you "call out for insight" (Proverbs 2:3). He answers you. 

Through it all is closeness to a person. That makes this path different from all others. God never intended us to bear the overwhelming burdens of life by ourselves. Instead, he gives himself - just the right person to bear them with us. "The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything. (Phil. 4:5-6)

Whenever God speaks to you about your fears, you can be sure he will say something about being close. He even patiently persuades you that he is close. He piles up the evidence. Still, you can be blind to that evidence when fears are close and anxieties ring loud. The process of letting anxieties go takes practice that engages with God himself - which means you will engage with Jesus."

Candy's thoughts: Here is another new book I recommend! While I have only begun to read it, I have already learned that it is GOOD. That being said, I was immediately tested big time, even today as I write this. (Think an overflowing septic system and our beautiful newly-renovated bathroom having to be renovated again - long story.)  UGH but YAY? If stress and fears bring us closer to God, then so be it. God is "piling up the evidence" of his faithfulness. 👍

Friends on Earth and Friends Above

"I go to prepare a place for you."  John 14:2

Charles Spurgeon's thoughts: "It struck me, as I turned this subject over in my mind, that our Lord Jesus Christ knew that there was a place to be prepared for each one of his people. You know that, even though you love all the brethren, you cannot help feeling most at home with some of them. Our blessed Lord and Master had no sinful favoritism, yet he did love twelve men better than all the rest of his disciples; and out of the twelve he loved three, whom he introduced into mysteries from which he excluded the other nine; and even out of the three, there was one, you know, who was 'that disciple whom Jesus loved.'  Now, everybody here has his likings; I do not know if we shall carry anything of that spirit to heaven. If we do, Christ has so prepared a place for us that you shall be nearest, in your position and occupation, to those who would contribute most to your happiness... But, depend upon it, if there be any association - any more intimate connection - between some saints than among others, Jesus Christ will so beautifully arrange it that we shall be in the happiest places."

Candy's thoughts: Oh what a blessed image it is of God, who knows us so well, surrounding us with our precious family and friends when we enter into the heavenly realms!  But far above all other friendships, consider this wonderful truth: "What a Friend we have in Jesus!" 💙

A Prescription for Anxiety

This past Friday I was able to catch just one live-stream session of the Christian Counseling and Educational Foundation's conference on Anxiety. The speaker was Alasdair Groves and the topic was "We Are Anxious People." Great title that applies to most of us, don't you think?

Groves had something startling to say, which is that all anxiety is not sinful. I had been under the impression that it was always bad - evidence that we are not trusting God in all circumstances. He based his theory on something Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 11:28.

"And, apart from other things, there is the daily pressure on me of my anxiety for all the churches." 

Wow. I guess I had never really noticed that verse before. Groves' point was not that 'since super-apostle Paul had anxiety, then it's okay for us to have anxiety,' but rather that there are real threats and real burdens in this world. The people we love and the world we live in present concerns and even dangers sometimes. Just as there is righteous anger that can rise up in the heart of a believer, there can be righteous anxiety as well.

The heart of the problem is what to do when anxiety begins to overwhelm us. Groves gave three red flags to look out for as we process worries and fears. The first is not to give in to painting God out of the picture by attempting to fix the problem ourselves. The second is when we start believing God won't be good - He won't protect us in the way we know how to protect ourselves. Finally, an alarm should be set off whenever we think or utter these two words: "What If..."  As Christians we are already on the wrong path if we are focusing our fretfulness on scenarios that are not even on the horizon yet.

What is the Bible's antidote to keep righteous anxiety from spinning into sinful anxiety? Groves had three suggestions:

* Read the Psalms when anxious.

* "Wait on the Lord" and realize this is an active command, not a passive one.

* Meditate on the truth that Christ will hold us fast.

Read, wait, and meditate seems like a very good prescription from One who is the Great Physician of our souls. 💜

Beautiful Prayer #1

"Now may our God and Father himself, and our Lord Jesus, direct our way to you, and may the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another, and for all, as we do for you, so that he may establish your hearts blameless in holiness before our God and Father, at the coming of our Lord Jesus with all his saints." (1 Thess. 3: 11-13)

Prayer written by Alexander MacColl based on the above text:

"Almighty God, our Father, help us to receive this day as a fresh gift from Thy loving hand, and to use it earnestly and joyously. Give us for its tasks, we pray Thee, vigor of body, clearness of mind and definiteness of purpose, but above all, the right spirit and the right heart.

"Look graciously upon our loved ones; place upon them Thy guiding and restraining hand. Comfort all who are sick and in sorrow; heal the wounded in spirit; recall the wandering. Strengthen all who are working earnestly for the Kingdom of our Lord, and grant that throughout the world this may be a day of great progress toward righteousness and peace.

"Thy Kingdom come. Thy will in us and in all men be done, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen."

Candy's thoughts: I cannot possibly improve upon this beautiful prayer by anything I can write here. I love it for its simplicity, humility, and devotion in word and deed to God and those that he places within our spheres of influence.  I will print this prayer out and use it often.  💕

Feet and Footsteps

"Therefore, be imitators of God, as dearly loved children, and walk in love, as Christ also loved us and gave himself for us, a sacrificial and fragrant offering to God."  (Eph. 5:1-2)

Spurgeon's thoughts: "Meditation is a happy, holy, profitable engagement; and it will instruct us, strengthen us, comfort us, inspire our hearts, and make our souls steadfast. But we may not stop at meditation. We must go on to imitation of the character of God. We must let our spiritual life not only bud and blossom in devout thought, but let it bring forth fruit in holy action. We must not be satisfied with feeding the soul by meditation but rise up from the banquet and use the strength we have gained. Sitting at the feet of Jesus must be succeeded by following the footsteps of Jesus."

Candy's thoughts: This quote of Charles Spurgeon immediately brought to mind the Mary/Martha relationship that seems to always have women groaning as they try to assess which woman they are more similar to concerning their own overall way of life. Are we more like Mary who spends so much time at Jesus' feet listening and learning that her poor sister Martha is stressed at trying to get dinner on the table without any help from Mary? When Martha demands that Jesus do something about this situation, his answer always cuts to the heart of all the Marthas in the world:

But the Lord answered her, 

“Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, 

but one thing is necessary. 

Mary has chosen the good portion, 

which will not be taken away from her.”  

(Luke 10: 41-42)

Sigh. Since I identify as a Martha, I always respond by muttering "OUCH" or something like that after reading this gentle rebuke by Jesus. I know that both personal devotions and service to others are necessary in our Christian lives, but I just love Spurgeon's wording: "Sitting at the feet of Jesus must be succeeded by following the footsteps of Jesus." What a beautiful visual analogy to remind us that we need to both learn from the Lord and also obey his precepts. Can we all agree on this? First be a Mary, then be a Martha. Listen at his feet, then follow in his footsteps.

Happy Birthday, Steve!

Have you ever wondered what my favorite paragraph is of all the books I've ever read? (You haven't? I'm shocked! 😎)  It is found in a book entitled Ten Angels in a Pontiac, written by Grace Spencer Magee, Steve's mom. This story chronicles the cross-country trip that their family took in 1960. At that point in time, there were ten children ages 17 and younger, plus two parents, all traveling from New Jersey to California and back in a Pontiac station wagon.

In Chapter 1, Steve's mom listed all the children, their ages, and their enthusiasm level (or lack thereof) for this trip. Predictably, the older ones thought this was a crazy idea, and the younger ones saw nothing but exciting adventures ahead. But here is what she writes about Steve:

"Steve, age two, agreed, but he was happy no matter what, so the 'when do we start' question was not nearly so pressing. Just being included was enough to keep his happiness at the peak and his security at its' usual high level. In addition to the twinkle in his eyes, he was born with a pleasant, jolly disposition. I'm sure that he was sent by God as a special messenger of the very nicest form of happiness, and all of us knew that he had been doing a first-rate job of fulfilling his mission."

For those of you who personally know Steve, isn't it remarkable that this was written nearly 60 years ago? How incredible is it that the description that his mom wrote would involve language such as this - language that very clearly tells of being "sent by God as a special messenger of the very nicest form of happiness."  For many reasons I wish that she were still alive, one among them being that she would be able to see that as a minister her youngest son is still doing a "first-rate job of fulfilling his mission."  Only God could have guided Grace Magee to write about the amazing grace that Steve is now proclaiming. WOW.

Bonus: Steve still has that twinkle in his eyes. See below! 

Quotables 2

I love my smart phone because it enables me to save so much time! I like being able to take a 'screenshot' of many things I find on the internet. I no longer have to scramble for a piece of paper and some writing utensil in order to remember facts or ideas, because with technology I can just take a picture of it. 😉

Here are the last few months of screenshots that I've collected featuring quotes from modern and not-so-modern theologians. I'd like to hear from you as to which ones you found most inspiring, memorable, convicting or thought provoking.

My favorites are the screenshot from above, then #1, #6, #9, #10. What about all you CandyceLand readers?


1.  "If you look at the world, you'll be distressed. If you look within, you'll be depressed. But if you look at Christ, you'll be at rest."  Corrie ten Boom

2.  "We all agree that forgiveness is a beautiful idea until we have something to forgive."  CS Lewis

3.  "Psalms teach us how to worship: Proverbs, how to behave; Job, how to suffer; Song of Solomon, how to love; and Ecclesiastes, how to live."  J. I. Packer

4.  "The ultimate aim is not to escape anxiety but to allow it to usher us into the healing presence of Jesus Christ."  Charles Spurgeon

5.  "In the end, the heart longs not for any of God's gifts, but for God Himself. To see him, know him, and be in his presence is the soul's final feast."  John Piper

6.  "To pray, 'thy will be done,' I must be willing, if the answer requires it, that my will be undone."  Elisabeth Elliott.

7. "The greatest nightmare of the approval addict is rejection; of the power addict, humiliation; of the comfort addict, suffering; and of the control addict, uncertainty."  Tim Keller

8.  "God always gives His best to those who leave the choice with Him."  Jim Elliot

9. "People will notice your faith, not when it gets you something, but when it costs you something."  Kevin DeYoung

10.  "Those who leave everything in God's hands will eventually see God's hands in everything."  Author Unknown

His Adorable Name

"And in the place where it was said to them, "You are not my people,' it shall be said to them, 'Children of the living God.'"  Hosea 1:10

Spurgeon's thoughts: "Sovereign grace can make strangers into sons.  And the Lord declares here his intent to deal in this way with rebels, and to ensure they know what he has done. Beloved reader, the Lord has done this in my case. Has he done this for you? Then let us join hands and hearts in praising his adorable name.

Some of us were so decidedly ungodly that the Lord's word most truly said to our conscience and heart, "You are not my people." In the house of God, and in our own homes, when we read the Bible, this was the voice of God's Spirit in our soul, "You are not my people." But now, in the same places, from the same ministry and Scripture, we hear a voice which says, "You are the children of the living God." Can we be grateful enough for this? Is it not wonderful? Does it not give us hope for others? Who is beyond the reach of almighty grace? How can we despair of anyone, since the Lord has brought about such a marvelous change in us?

He who has kept this one great promise will keep every other. Therefore let us go forward with songs of adoration and confidence."

Candy's thoughts: There is so much that could be said of this wonderful commentary by Charles Spurgeon on Hosea 1:10, but I will concentrate on just two points. The first that struck me was the phrase, "...praising his adorable name." Perhaps in previous generations this was a common way of speaking of God's name, but I had never heard it referred to as "adorable." I am very accustomed to speaking this way about cute babies and playful puppies, but God's name? Of course it makes sense. Adorable means 1."Extremely charming and appealing. 2. Worthy of adoration and veneration."  The God of creation and providence is indeed worthy to be adored. So I hope to use this wording when speaking of God's name in the future. I like it!

The second is the sentence: "How can we despair of anyone, since the Lord has brought about such a marvelous change in us?"  Perhaps my deepest prayers are reserved for the prodigals in our lives. I have such a long list, and after many years I can get discouraged when I (think) I see no progress in those I know who have rejected Him or see Almighty God as irrelevant and therefore unworthy of attention at all. But those of us who have been saved by Him should never think it impossible that others might be saved as well. After all, as Isaiah 59:1 states: "Behold, the Lord's hand is not shortened that it cannot save, or his ear dull, that it cannot hear."

Praise be to God that He has rescued us from the place where it was said of us "You are not my people" but delivered us to the place where we can be called "Children of the living God." And let's pray in confident expectation that He will rescue our loved ones as well. In His adorable name, AMEN!

Labor Day 2019

Did you know that today is the 125th Anniversary of the federal holiday known as Labor Day?  Well, neither did I until I started researching the history of this annual celebration. Wikipedia informs us that "It honors the American labor movement and the power of collective action by laborers who are essential for the workings of society." Following my own rabbit trail of musings on this definition, I began to wonder about "labor in the Lord" and how that kind of work is essential for the workings of God's kingdom and society. Here is a smattering of verses related to that idea:


Exodus 20:9 - Six days you shall labor, and do all your work.

Psalm 104:23 - Man goes out to his work and to his labor until the evening.

Ecclesiastes 2:20 - So I turned about and gave my heart up to despair over all the toil of my labors under the sun.

Isaiah 13:8 - They will be dismayed: pangs and agony will seize them; they will be in anguish like a woman in labor. They will look aghast at one another; their faces will be aflame.

Isaiah 55:2 - Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which does not satisfy?

Daniel 6:14 - Then the king, when he heard these words, was much distressed and set his mind to deliver Daniel. And he labored till the sun went down to rescue him.

Matthew 9:37 - Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest.”

James 5:4 - Behold, the wages of the laborers who mowed your fields, which you kept back by fraud, are crying out against you, and the cries of the harvesters have reached the ears of the Lord of hosts.

1 Corinthians 15:58 - Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain.

Matthew 11:28 - Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.


There is much to say about all these verses, but let me close with some thoughts on the last two listed. First, we all need to remember that God is pleased to use our labors. He does not need us, but He has determined to give us the privilege of working for His kingdom. In the Lord, your labor is not in vain. 

Second, if you want to know who really did all the heavy lifting for us, think about Jesus. Because He labored so well, we are invited to enjoy perfect rest in Him. So to all who labor, hear His wonderful words: "Come to me" and "I will give you rest."

Where Has That Verse Been All My Life?

I think it's a nearly universal experience for believers that we can read the Bible for years and years, and still occasionally have those "Where has THAT verse been all my life?!" moments. It happened to me again a couple of days ago. I was reading these words in Job:

"But he [God] is unchangeable, and who can turn him back? What he desires, that he does. For he will complete what he appoints for me, and many such things are in his mind."  (Job 23:13-14)

I had many reactions to reading this. Here are a few, in no particular order:

1. God is sovereign throughout our lives, which is very reassuring and comforting. He is God, and we are not.

2. God appoints certain events, both those that feel good to us and those that don't, for our ultimate well-being and sanctification.

3. This reminds me of a John Piper quote: "God is always doing 10,000 things in your life, and you may be aware of 3 of them."

4. These verses are very similar to Proverbs 16:9.  "The heart of a man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps."

5. Where should we turn in times of trouble?  Psalm 57:2 gives us the answer: "I cry out to God Most High, to God who fulfills his purpose for me."

6. I love that God has a purpose for me! I may not always know exactly what it is, but He "...who began a good work in you will bring it to completion..."  (Phil. 1:6)

7. How amazing is it that our God has "many such things in his mind" for each and every one of us? I cannot fathom that kind of brain power. I can't even remember what I had for dinner two days ago.

How about all of you? Do these verses in Job teach you something or remind you of other similar words in the Bible?  I'd love to hear from you. 😉

Recap of CandyceLand in VacationLand

Personal update: Steve and I just returned from 4 weeks of study and vacation. We hadn't taken time off since last August, so it took a while for us to get used to a break from our regular schedule.

The first week was characterized by peace and quiet. We rented a little carriage house in Bowdoinham, ME, with 3 rooms surrounded by lots of trees. We ate out lunch every day, but morning and night we were reading. Technically Steve read more books than I did, but my books had more pages in them. Not that I'm competitive at all.  😆

The second week was just the opposite of peace and quiet, more like noise and chaos. A small bathroom renovation turned into a big project, and the contractor forgot to tell us to cover everything in the adjacent room. So when we returned home, there was drywall dust everywhere in Max and Henry's playroom. Every Lego, every stuffed animal, every train, every ball, every everything needed to be washed with soap and water. In the midst of this I got the really fun idea to change around 3 of our rooms, so it was up the stairs and down the stairs with furniture and closets of clothes and toys and ALL THE THINGS.  In this same week, Katie and Jonathan and the boys moved into a new home so we were helping with that too! We were physically exhausted, but it was worth it. Well, right now it's worth it because it's all done and we like the final results. 😎

The third week was somewhere in-between the first two weeks: quiet at times but busy. We had mornings to ourselves, and then Max and Henry joined us for the afternoons. Lots of swimming at the Exeter Pool and prepping for the final week...

Week 4 was an absolute delight! For the past several years we've rented a house and had all the kids join us. (This time Kristin and Dan could not come out from Pittsburgh since Dan graduated that weekend from his MBA program. 🎉)  But we finally found a house we all agreed was the best one yet! It had a terrific view of the Presidential Range in the White Mountains of NH and the most spectacular sunsets I've ever seen. There was a beach nearby that worked well for our family. We all shared the cooking, and we had some amazing dinners when we all came together at the end of the day. Steve may/may not have beaten me in the book reading category again, but I had lots of time playing with the boys, so all is well. 👍

All in all, it was a wonderful time of relaxation and busyness and productivity and delightful family times around the dinner table while playing cards and games with one another. We are very thankful for everyone who filled in for us and enables us to go away. We're back now and eager to see everyone and get EPC ready for the next season of church life!

Here are scenes from our vacation house, but they do not come even close to the majesty of seeing God's amazing and creative landscapes in person!